Based on the very cool They Fight Crime! by Andrew Wheeler & Alasdair Watson, this is a Perl re-write of their JavaScript so I could use it for my email signatures.

"He's a genetically engineered pirate master criminal moving from town to town, helping folk in trouble. She's a high-kicking thirtysomething queen of the dead looking for love in all the wrong places. They fight crime!"

Another "they fight crime!"

fight_crime.pl.txt