Based on the very cool They Fight Crime! by Andrew Wheeler & Alasdair Watson, this is a Perl re-write of their JavaScript so I could use it for my email signatures.

"He's a sword-wielding Jewish senator who hides his scarred face behind a mask. She's a manipulative belly-dancing pearl diver on the trail of a serial killer. They fight crime!"

Another "they fight crime!"

fight_crime.pl.txt